Page created 15 May 2003 by emad , last modified 15 May 2003 by emad
For those of you non-smokers, like me, you have a problem. You know the one I'm talking about. You keep telling yourself you want to start smoking and so you think it is as simple as just starting. Light up and you're smoking!
Unfortunately, its not that easy. Within hours, days, or if you are lucky weeks, you realize that you ARE NOT SMOKING?! You just don't have that craving for a big long cigaroo after you eat, wake up, smoke a cigarette, or jog 2 miles. Lots of smokers don't understand this point. They think starting is as easy as just lighting a cigarette. "Thats how I got started, you just don't have any willpower" they proclaim.
Disclaimer- this will not work for everyone. In fact, it is very, very hard to do. Starting cigarettes is the hardest thing I have ever done.
Around 1998, I saw my chance to start, as I had just started college. Everyone was lighting up and acting cool, everyone but me!
How not to start
You cannot start, one step at a time. You can't start with a few a day and then "eventually start smoking 2 packs a day". You can't gradually start. When you start, you have to start You have to make the decision that you will always smoke cigarettes.
I knew this, as I had not only had everyone who had ever successfully started tell me, but I had tried to ramp up slowly enough times I knew it wouldn't work.
Finally, I decided on patches. The patches actually get you into the habit, so you can concentrate on getting the nicotine addiction gradually, while you don't have to concentrate on actually smoking.
I started with the first level patch, the lowest nicotine supply. Over the weeks I would upgrade to the more potent patches. At the same time, try to build up the mental habits of a smoker. Start holding a toothpick in your mouth or chewing gum after every meal.
After a few weeks, you'll want to start replacing these habits with an actual cigarette, which is what I did. IT TASTED GREAT! The worst is over, you'll have some bad times when you really don't want a cigarette, miss one cigarette appointment and you'll end up at square one, a non-smoker.
You will want a cigarette after eating, when drinking coffee, when smoking another cigarette, leaving work, and when you smell secondhand smoke. You will want a cigarette when you are angry, and you will want a cigarette when you smell bad smells.
Nicotine is a stimulant, and like many other stimulants is an appetite suppressant. This is the reason you want a cigarette when you are hungry- it takes the edge off of the hunger. It is also the reason many people lose weight after starting- the appetite is suppressed, and the metabolism is faster. WIN WIN!
One of the supposed "benefits" of not smoking is a heihghtened sense of smell. This is true, but it is most certainly NOT a benefit! Food smells the same, flowers smell the same, nice smells smell the same- it is the bad odors that you smell more. Having a lessened sense of smell is actually a benefit of smoking. You, as a smoker, no longer have to deal with the bad smells emminating from garbage dumps, manure pits, other smokers and yourself.
After eating, a cigarette makes you feel more satisfied. It also releases certain brain chemicals associated with pleasure. When drinking coffee, the two stimulants combine, and the coffee stimulation makes you want the nicotine stimulation.
Remember, continue with the rituals, smoke when you feel like but also smoke after every meal and other times when it would be appropriate, for instance, in a crowded subway car.
For the first several months, stay out of non-smoking bars and restaraunts. Try to hang out near doorways packed with other smokers. If a "killer-urge" to smoke doesnt come to you once in a while, stay calm, it will pass. I suggest staying calm by smoking the biggest cigarette you have.
Know that no matter how bad a cigarette may taste at some time in the future, you'll love them anyways. I'm a free man, you too will be free to smoke! Good luck!
troll delivered, as predicted.
Between andronicus and emad, preferably some kind of serial story.
to see it too, but I also think it would be scary beyond human comprehension.
about smoking the biggest cigarette you have. That's some good stuff emad.
You're already rolling your own! I'm so proud of you!